A Case Against Barack Obama For President

There is no doubt that Barack Obama is smooth, charming, and articulate--exactly the kind of person that doesn't make for a good president. He would make a good actor, perhaps. A decent preacher, yes, for sure. But a president has to be rather old, nondescript and congenial--like the way the elder George Bush occupied his office.

Unlike his son, W, the senior Bush emanated an air of sedate wisdom and compassion, almost like an elder neighbour who doesn't mind raking leaves off part of your lawn as a matter of course--a person, quite frankly, too old and relaxed to be involved in any kind of sex or bribery scandal. And, unlike his son, he was someone with enough restraint and sense (and lack of bloodlust or vainglory) not to allow U.S. forces to enter Baghdad.

That kind of practical sense is not something you find in great abundance in presidential candidates lately. Not in Hillary Clinton, not in John McCain, and not in John Edwards. Perhaps a little bit in Al Gore (but he is probably rather unelectable now). Sadly, then, the best candidates for the presidency are probably found behind the counters of corner stores, in front of elementary classrooms, or sitting in retirement homes--ordinary, friendly, and decent people who have no interest in hopping around the country making fancy speeches or squabbling in debates. The old adage that 'no one good enough to be President would actually run for President' is truer now than it ever was.

One has to question the sanity of anyone willing to undergo the rigorous path towards winning the presidency. Obama has spent many years helping youth and poor communities in Chicago--doing some real good. Why would he abandon that for higher office? It simply stretches the imagination to think that he genuinely believes he could do more constructive good for people in the White House than in the inner neighborhoods of Chicago. No, for a man of his age, presidential aspirations could only be about one thing: ego gratification. While a big ego is not a bad thing in the arena of sports, film, or music, it can be a disastrous trait for a head of a country.

There has been a lot of mess created by the current president. A big mess. What the USA really needs nows is a patient, mature person to come in and clean up the yard. What the country really needs now is an old, wise, (and perhaps even boring) leader. A person lacking in charisma; stodgy, stuffy, perhaps even a little smelly. Just a good old man one can trust like a grandfather (a person who may not exist so far in the current field of candidates).

So, until Barack Obama gets more white hairs, has suffered humiliating setbacks, and develops a cool, grandmotherly wisdom and resolve, he can serve his country best by keeping his theatrical acumen to the Senate floor or in his living room.

Ode To A Minimum-Wage Employee

Popped in for a coffee to go
I could see your eyes soft and glistening
Sweet angel, don't despair
The stars really are listening

You can't afford high-speed access
Much less wireless
But your efforts are so pure,
True and tireless

They tell you the customer is always right
When we both know they are almost always wrong
The bell will toll for thee, exiled princess
And you will be singing the best song

While the masses complain about cold coffee,
For eight-dollars an hour, you force an apologetic smile
Don't worry, pretty baby
There are rewards at the end of that extra mile

Keep your chin up and your head nobly high
Your true destiny lies beyond this greasy pit stop
For this is no lie,
You are the true hero and you're headed to the top